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Old 09-17-2012, 02:23 PM   #1
ADiamond240sx
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Things Said During Sex

So whats the strangest, most fucked up thing YOU PERSONALLY have either said or been told during a sexual encounter?

I'll start this one off. My ex-wife told me "You don't pull out the anal beeds like you're trying to start a lawn mower!" and then ran to the bathroom.
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Old 09-17-2012, 02:31 PM   #2
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Originally Posted by ADiamond240sx View Post
So whats the strangest, most fucked up thing YOU PERSONALLY have either said or been told during a sexual encounter?

I'll start this one off. My ex-wife told me "You don't pull out the anal beeds like you're trying to start a lawn mower!" and then ran to the bathroom.
ohhh wow
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Old 09-17-2012, 02:33 PM   #3
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Originally Posted by ADiamond240sx View Post
So whats the strangest, most fucked up thing YOU PERSONALLY have either said or been told during a sexual encounter?

I'll start this one off. My ex-wife told me "You don't pull out the anal beeds like you're trying to start a lawn mower!" and then ran to the bathroom.
Lmfao!!
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Old 09-17-2012, 02:40 PM   #4
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does sobbing uncontrollably count?
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Old 09-17-2012, 02:41 PM   #5
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Lol. Dummy. I've seen you start a lawnmower. You put your foot on the engine, both hands on the pull start and kick off. Hope her head didn't hit the headboard.
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Old 09-17-2012, 02:41 PM   #6
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"I promise I won't tell anyone if you just put the gun down. I haven't even seen your face.." - Some chick..
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Old 09-17-2012, 02:42 PM   #7
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Aaron i had to make that my sig...some of the funniest shit i've heard in a while.
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Old 09-17-2012, 02:42 PM   #8
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"I promise I won't tell anyone if you just put the gun down. I haven't even seen your face.." - Some chick..
rape culture.
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Old 09-17-2012, 02:46 PM   #9
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rape culture.
It was Jamie Kilstein that I raped.
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Old 09-17-2012, 02:49 PM   #10
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It was Jamie Kilstein that I raped.
"all is forgiven" i have heard that a few times.
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Old 09-17-2012, 02:51 PM   #11
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well when its with you its mostly "no, no please stop" or "omg gross" or "is that it?" or silence because you have already killed them.
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Old 09-17-2012, 02:58 PM   #12
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Laying in bed afterwords I just hear. "Wanna die?" In a high pitch voice...
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Old 09-17-2012, 03:00 PM   #13
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"can you put your toe in my ass" my simple reply was can you call your bestfriend over. I thought she say no. But it was a Charlie sheen kinda night. WINNING!!
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Old 09-17-2012, 03:14 PM   #14
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oh are we making things up for this thread?? ^

in that case. oh she was like " omg can you just put bats in my ass, and ill invite all my friends from cheer camp over and we'll all suck your dick off"

and then i was about to bone my girlfriend out at the lake, but suddenly she yelled and i looked up and it was big foot, then i went back to bone her but the misquitos were going crazy and she said there was no way.
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Old 09-17-2012, 03:16 PM   #15
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lmfao^
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Old 09-17-2012, 08:01 PM   #16
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I'll start this one off. My ex-wife told me "You don't pull out the anal beeds like you're trying to start a lawn mower!" and then ran to the bathroom.
http://www.houston240sx.com/showthread.php?t=48160

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anyway, i met a gothic chick at a bar, ened up going to her place ( i got a ride to the bar, so she drove me) and she hands me these beads and tells me to put it in her ass, so i do and then she says pull them out. now for some reason i was thinking chainsaw so i rip them out fast like u would a chainsaw and the only thing that came out of that was blood, shit and hurt feelings. i walked out the door as she was in pain...ran my ass home.
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Old 09-17-2012, 08:06 PM   #17
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oh are we making things up for this thread?? ^

in that case. oh she was like " omg can you just put bats in my ass, and ill invite all my friends from cheer camp over and we'll all suck your dick off"

and then i was about to bone my girlfriend out at the lake, but suddenly she yelled and i looked up and it was big foot, then i went back to bone her but the misquitos were going crazy and she said there was no way.
Lol I don't need to make it up bro. Op asked. I told the truth. Lol. I've got the child support stubs to prove how well that night ended
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Old 09-17-2012, 08:09 PM   #18
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I would love to prep that thread for a return but the newbs we have now would fuck it up. Damn that was a good thread though, for a short time.
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Old 09-17-2012, 08:23 PM   #19
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i had a girl tell me "your like a leaky faucet i cant turn you off" im wasn't sure what she ment so i just put in her ass!
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Old 09-17-2012, 08:29 PM   #20
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i had a girl tell me "your like a leaky faucet i cant turn you off" im wasn't sure what she ment so i just put in her ass!
I think she meant the situation felt a bit "rapey".. which leads me to my next saying.

Me:So you have any questions for me?
Her:Yea, what sorta things do you like?
Me:Rape, murder, arson, and rape.
Her:You said "rape" twice....
Me:...I like rape....
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Old 09-17-2012, 08:48 PM   #21
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in my defense she was 20 i was 30 and she said older guys could not last long with a young girl with out viagra..................... CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!!!!
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Old 09-17-2012, 09:00 PM   #22
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in my defense she was 20 i was 30 and she said older guys could not last long with a young girl with out viagra..................... CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!!!!
lol
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Old 09-17-2012, 09:03 PM   #23
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in my defense she was 20 i was 30 and she said older guys could not last long with a young girl with out viagra..................... CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!!!!

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Old 09-17-2012, 09:44 PM   #24
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Old 09-17-2012, 10:16 PM   #25
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If a chick asked me to piss on her chest I would seriously start to reflect on my last 5 decisions.
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